Are You Who You Want To Be?

The WordPress Daily Prompt Asked: Ballerina Fireman Astronaut Movie Star: When you were 10, what did you want to be when you grew up? What are you now? Are the two connected?

Quote about living the life you want.

A job is a job and not always the one you want; moreover, finding any job is becoming harder and harder, as Martin Ford author of  The Rise of the Robots notes:

     The hard truth is that the traditional solution to unemployment and poverty—and the solution that nearly all analysts and policy makers continue to support—is not going to be sufficient in the robotic age. Education has incalculable value both on a personal level, and as a public good that benefits society as a whole. For those reasons, we should continue to strongly support it and invest in it. We should not, however, expect ever more schooling to assure workers a foothold in the future economy.

In terms of the prompt:  at about the age of ten, I wanted to be like Velvet Brown. Who was she? The 12-year-old girl played by Elizabeth Taylor in National Velvet. disguised as a male jockey and with a bit of help from her family and Mickey Rooney, she rode to victory in England’s Grand National Race.

I just wanted to be her and be a jockey.  Sad to say,  at that time, I was going through a growth spurt. For a few days I stood with a huge dictionary on my head, trying to control the lengths to which my body was aspiring. My neck ached too much to continue and I gave up that dream.

Now that I look back on all my jobs, I realize I never wanted to be a social worker. Out of college, I wanted to be a journalist. But social work was the only job I could get after college. Why not writing or even editing?

Because I was an English major with a good brain, but also had dysgraphia. The good brain got me through college and eventually graduate school, but because of the dysgraphia whatever  I wrote needed  the type of editing  my brain could not provide. Eventually, word processing, a unique story, and kind editors helped me become a published author, but that is a story for another day.

The point I want to make?  A job is just a job and the title it bears has nothing to do with the real you. Want to make a difference in the world? Think being a doctor will make the most difference? Wrong. Garbage men in all their various disguises save more lives than doctors.

Moreover, garbage pickup disposal is being automated. Go to Volvo Waste Disposal for a peek at that the future that has already hit a town near you.  The trucks are already in place and as the article notes Volvo is working to eliminate the need for truck drivers.


Emotional Fitness Training Tips

Tip one: Stop thinking of a job as the roadway to happiness. Do you know that a high proportion of doctors commit suicide?

Tip two: Remember a job is what people are paid to do and most others do not want to do. Remember the low status of garbage men.

Tip three: Get real about your strengths and weaknesses.  If only your family thinks you’re the next American Idol or Olympic medalist, you are on the wrong path.

Tip four: Lower you sights and hone your work ethic. Why do so many jobs get outsourced. People living in underdeveloped countries want  a paycheck for survival purposes; they know a good work ethic gets and keeps you employed.

Tip five: Pursue your passions but for the pleasure each brings. A  passion drives you in ways other things do not. I might never have been published; I might never make a financial success of Emotional Fitness Training, but I have written every day since the third grade. I cannot not write.

Writing is one of my passions. Sharing knowledge is another which is why I loved teaching at the graduate school level. This passion of mine also explains why after I failed to publish and make tenure, I settle for teaching as an adjunct professor the lowest step on the academic ladder. Also why I keep on with Emotional Fitness Training, Inc, through blogging and my social media efforts.

But as I noted in another blog I have also been blessed With A Little Bit of Luck.and I have had more than a little luck

I had parents who knew what mattered.  I had teachers who valued my good brain and not whether my spelling and punctuation were spot on.  I was in school before standardized tests came to be. Born today and I probably might not make it out of high school. I found jobs I could do that satisfied the common human need to make a difference. I married a man who pushed me to be all I could be; David and I became oddities by agreeing to be special need foster parents, and being oddities lead to becoming an author, but only because technology in the form of word processing had been developed and my writing became passable.

When we stopped being foster parents, I didn’t get the job I wanted because of my dysgraphia; I  misspelled a word on my handwritten Thank You note. luckily, I  ended up working happily for fourteen years at the job I did get and didn’t think I wanted.  That job allowed me to more fully develop Emotional Fitness Training.

Tip six: Remember what matters.  All of us want to be appreciated for who we are by the people who matter the most to us.  We want quality relationship. B oth the sages of the ages and modern day researchers agree: the key to quality relationships lies in treating others as you want to be treated.

What matters? Kindness to all.

This Poster Coach is available as a free download at the EFTI Store

Parenting tipS

Just as I wanted to be Velvet Brown, children pick heroes and heroines to fuel their dreams. Today’s media promotes heroism, but not the easily spotted good guys and gals so prevalent when I was growing up.

My tips? Monitor what your child watches;  gradually expose  him or her to popular media and  discuss the messages;  support the Golden Rules;  practice gratitude and kindness.


My eBook Know Your Mission So You Can Reach Your Goalsl discusses the above in greater detail. All my products cost less than a latte and their value lasts a bit longer, or so I like to think.


Sharing is caring; so is liking, or commenting. All three help keep me going.

Thank you and work at staying strong until next time,. I work hard to do the same as life is often difficult, but exercises like this one lets me find the good.



These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.

Easy Emotional Fitness Exercises (
The five components of Emotional Intelligence ( Intelligence ( Fitness Tips for Parents  (
An Emotional Fitness Program for Parents(


Agree or disagree, comments are always welcomed.

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