WHY, WHY ME, WHY NOT ME, NO WHY, KNOW WHY.   When I am hurting, I hate hearing “Every thing happens for a reason.”   Not helpful when I am standing dead in the water, doubled over in pain, wanting to sink down and end it all. and not sure if or how I will go on.  Now thinking this is personal doubles the pain. Do I need painfl lessons?  No thank you. It may be wise to look for a lesson, but I refuse to believe life has a curriculm designed specifically for me.  Am I being punished for some sin I did, or worse for the sins of my fathers and mothers. Not  my idea of how an all wise, all loving creator proceeds.  So I don’t believe my life has been specifically planned for me.  What happens to me is partly the decisions I make and partly life doing its thing whether I approve or not.

So I don’t believe all that happens for a reason related to me.  At the same time one of my soothing thoughts is “It’s all all right.”  I think I first heard or read that from a Buddhist   I think one of the  messages in  Thich Nhat Hanh’s book Peace in Every Step He  challenges you to see the  garbage in the rose and the roses in the garbage.

Then there was Lewis Thomas’s book The Lives of a Cell .  He pointed out that scientists could not create DNA because they would want it to be perfect; DNA’s creative ability, however, lies in the fact that it mutates randomly and for no reason any  scientist can understand.  Some of the mutations improve life on earth; many spell disaster for the individual cells.   At the level of daily life,  randomness also rules and chance or luck visits capriciously sometimes to the benefit of all but the detriment of the individual.

Now here’s the  catch: Is the randomness planned by some higher force than we know?  That would mean everything has a purpose. Sigh.   I find comfort in the idea of a creative force existing somewhere out there and as it is my belief that the best of human life is the capacity to care and nourish others.  I choose to believe that is a reflection of a creative force  more caring than we can imagine, but I don’t know.    I believe “It is all all right” whether right for me or planned by a higher power or not.

My philosophy says when I don’t know, come down on the most comforting belief.  So there is a higher purpose, but not one that necessarily intervenes in my life, but is a force of love. Afterall there are miracles, real miracles happening to real people.  So as  it is with many things, a yes/and proposition. Yes,  there might be a purpose and there might not  a purpose.  Take your pick.  I did and mine  helps me stay strong.

Topic #17   Do you believe everything happens for a reason? Why or why not?

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