Get ready to laugh

SHARING A  LAUGH: A long one but worth a read and a little something to mull over. Thank High School friend Jack  for this.  Not a facebooker, but sends me jokes regularly through email. He could use some good thoughts, treatment for the big C.

A  cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture
in Montana when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud
of dust.

The driver, a young man in a Brioni® suit, Gucci® shoes, RayBan® sunglasses
and YSL® tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, “If I tell you
exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a

Bud looks at the man, who obviously is a yuppie, then looks at his
peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, “Sure, why not?”

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell® notebook computer, connects it
to his Cingular RAZR V3® cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the
Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his
location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area
in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop® and exports
it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany ….

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot® that the image has
been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL® database
through an ODBC connected Excel® spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry®
and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech,
miniaturized HP LaserJet® printer, turns to the cowboy and says, “You have
exactly 1,586 cows and calves.”

“That’s right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves,” says Bud.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with
amusement as the young man   stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

Then Bud says to the young man, “Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your
business is, will you give me back my animal?”

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, “Okay, why not?”

“You’re a Congressman for the U.S. Government”, says Bud.

“Wow! That’s correct,” says the yuppie, “but how did you guess that?”

“No guessing required.” answered the cowboy. “You showed up here even though
nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a
question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment
trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don’t know a
thing about how working people make a living – or about cows, for that

Now give me back my dog.


CRANKY OLD LADY THOUGHTS  Hope you laughed, I did.  The older you get, the younger the experts look.  And the current round of those I see running for Congress are in the baby club. To me, doctor’s look like toddlers, teachers like nursery school students, and CEOs like first graders. And yes, I do exaggerate.

One of the things that frightened me when I was teaching master level students at Columbia University School of Social Work were the administrative students.  Too many were kids right out of college, dripping behind the ears, still whining at times for a pacifier and thinking that they knew how to run a social service agency or department.   Scary enough that the regular students–those  wanting to be therapists of one sort or another, also looked like nursery school candidates; at least they would be supervised.  Those gearing up to become administrators were aiming to be the supervisors.

That’s when I began to realize the education system was more interested in money than educational outcomes.  Still a problem. One of my cranky rants.

Of course, even sadder is the denigration of the wisdom of those who have lived past 30.  Make me sound like a cranky old lady? Well, I am, remember.  And I am old enough to see those who promoted the idea that 30 was the end point of wisdom, squirming as they have moved into their rocking chairs.

Even Oprah is focusing on how to age gracefully or gratefully.  Sadly she still is hawking about looking younger than you are.  Cranky Old Lady feels she earned every gray hair and wrinkle, so don’t tell her she looks younger than she is.  Makes her very cranky and that makes Cranky Old Man Cranky and things get nasty.

Anyway, this Cranky Old Lady  is proud of making this far and wants all the credit she can get for her journey.

Sigh.  End of that rant.  On to a staying strong tip.

STAYING STRONG TIP  See expert advice as general, not specific.  Just because some one has a degree doesn’t mean they know a calf from a dog.  At the same time, just because someone has a baby face and looks like they should still be in diapers doesn’t mean they don’t know some thing helpful that you don’t know.

Advice is a suggestion, an idea to consider, an experiment.  Think about it, maybe give it a try, but don’t accept it as the truth as applied to you and your life.  It could be; it could not be.

FUEL MY HOPES:  Be kind to  me,  get kindness badges for you, and help others get and stay strong.  Kindness is an Emotional Fitness Exercise.  Click here for all 12 Daily Emotional Fitness Training Exercises.

IMAGE BY: Shuttercock 

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