Forgiving Self and Others

Forgiveness involves accepting imperfection, knowing all are flawed and everyone’s  task is to strive everyday to be a better, kinder person.

Quotes about forgiveness

Every time someone hurts you, you are being given an opportunity to practice forgiveness.  Every time someone is angry about something you said or did, you are being given another opportunity to practice forgiveness. The more you practice the easier it is to repair the bridge keep you and others connected.

Emotional Fitness Tips 

Tip one:  Forgiveness can only start when  all are safe and the hurt that leads to the need to forgive is no longer happening.

Once safety is established, past hurts keep hurting  only when  you keep the hurt alive.  However, sending such hurts to the grave requires an effort. Think of forgiveness as a muscle that needs strengthening.

Tip Two: Practice this  daily forgiveness exercise 

Review the day. Maybe some hurt or anger lingers on from when someone said something unkind. Did someone treat you unfairly?  Take without giving in return? Break a promise? Betray a hope?   Embarrass you in public?  Say or do something cruel?

Perhaps the negative you need to let go of is some wrong you did.  Maybe you treated another unfairly.  Maybe you were angry or thoughtless and now regret your actions.  When you need forgiveness, it means stopping the wrongful behavior, not repeating it and making amends.

Part of being able to forgive yourself or another involves letting go of pain.     Pain teaches important lessons. Pain reminds us to keep our hands out of the fire.  Pain reminds us to enjoy the good when it comes.  Pain reminds us to be careful about expecting more than we, another,  or life can deliver. Think lessons, not punishment.

So pain hurts, but it also brings its gifts.  Honor those gifts, let go of the rest. Take a deep breath.  Smile.  Breathe in and out.  The past is over.  See the person who hurt you asking forgiveness.  See the person you hurt forgiving you.  Forgive—if not completely, then as much as you can and then let go.

We all fail to do or be our best.  We all make mistakes.  We all need forgiveness for one thing or another.

PARENTING TIPS

Parenting Tip One: As the stronger one in the parent/child relationship, give forgiveness with every punishment.  How?  Remember the five positives for each negative rule.  Learn and use EFTI’s CARE Plan
the-care-plan

Parenting Tip Two: Always ask to be forgiven when you have done wrong.  Always. 

Parenting Tip Three: Parents of teens would also benefit from learning to avoid giving into Gotcha Wars.  See this eBook for more about Gotcha Wars.

PRACTICE KINDNESS

Please rate this material. Doing so helps my social media ratings, but also lets me know what interests you most. Comments also help.

This is what your stars will mean to me. No stars – Not helpful; One star – Reinforced my knowledge –  Two Stars; New information –  Three stars;  New useful information; Four stars – Very good; Five stars – Excellent.

Thank you and work at staying strong until next time,. I work hard to do the same as life is often difficult but staying strong lets me find the good.

Katherine

This post was not inspired by this WordPress Daily Prompt  A Storybook Day. You have to spend one day as or with your favorite fictional character. Which one would it be and what would you do?

Storybook characters are not real. I prefer to be me as I am flaws and all. The flaws fuel my mission to be a bit better each day.

LINKS OF INTEREST

These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.

Emotional Intelligence (en.wikipedia.org)
The five components of Emotional Intelligence (www.sonoma.edu)
An Emotional Fitness Program for Parents(amazon.com)

 

2 Comments

    • The brain doesn’t want you hurt again so remembering is a way to stay safe, but letting go of the hurt and anger keep you emotionally safer. We all have to work hard to let go of these two aspects. Thank you for your comment.

Agree or disagree, comments are always welcomed.