How Emotionally Fit Are You- A Brief Test Plus Five Helpful Tips

Cartoon: Are You Normal

We all worry a bit about whether we are normal or not. Well, normal is defined many ways. It is the center of a mean.  It means not being diagnosed with a mental illness. It means a natural occurrence. Technically, it means being at right angles. Finally, it means meeting the accepted standard of a community.

I remember a story, I think it was by Ursula K. Le Guin,  in which being blind was thought normal; any  sighted person arriving on that particular planet immediately had their eyes put out,  Moreover, doing so was considered an act of kindness; it made the person normal. Sigh.

Then there was the Twilight Zone story of a girl considered beautify by our planet’s standards, but considered so ugly in another planet, she had to undergo plastic surgery to be considered normally beautiful there. Another sigh. 

I prefer to thing kind or cruel instead of normal or not. With that in mind, see how I would rate your Emotional Fitness. Rate yourself on the indicated scales. Note your score for each question and then add all the individual scores together for a final score.

An Emotional Fitness Test

Think about the past month when answering.

1.What is your general mood?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

Fantastic

Very Good

Okay

Not Good

Suicidal

2. How much is stress a part of your life?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

No stress

Very little

Normal

Some

Too much

3. How do you feel about yourself?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

Love self

Like self

Okay

Don’t like

Hate self

4. What are your feelings about most other people?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

Love all

Like most

Half and half

Dislike most

Hate most

5. How much time do you spend with fear, worry, or anxiety?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

None

Very little

Some

Too much

Much too much

6. How much trouble do you get into because of anger?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

None

Little

Some

Lots

Arrested

7. How much do you get done despite negative feelings?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

High

achiever

Get all done

Most done

Lots undone

Little done

8. Do you feel you are in control of your life?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

Yes

Mostly

More then not

Very little

Not at all

9. Do you take action and then wonder why you did not think first?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

Never

Rarely

Now and then

Often

Too often

10. Do feelings seem to come out of the blue and surprise you with their intensity?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

Never

Occasionally

Half and half

Lots

Often

11. When a strong feeling visits can you stay calm enough to act wisely?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

Always

Usually

Mostly

Not

Arrested

12. In a dispute of any kind, do you listen closely enough to the other person’s point of view to find some common ground?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

Always

Mostly

Often

Rarely

Never

13. Are you honest?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

To a fault

More than not

Mostly

Depends

Arrested

14. Are you a giver? 

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

To a fault

More than not

Mostly

Mostly take

Taker


15. Have you been easy on yourself or hard in answering these questions?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

Hard

Mostly hard

Half and half

Mostly easy

Easy

16. How much would those who know you well agree will with your answers reflect you?

Five

Four

Three

Two

One

Score

Definitely

Mostly

Half and half

Somewhat

Little

Total score _________

How to score: Obviously, the higher your score the more you control negative feelings. However, while you scored 90,  you might be an Emotional Fitness Super Star or you might be lying to yourself.

Most people will score somewhere in the middle. The lower your score the more you might need therapy. 

Remember EFT’s tests are designed to start you thinking and are not research validated.

Tips To Improve Your Emotional Fitness

Whatever this test made you think about, you will strengthen your emotional fitness – the ability to manage stress and negative feelings – by following these tips.

Tip one: Recognize and rate your flawed behavior.  Rating things is an important Emotional Fitness Skill. Why? In order to rate you must stop and think. Stopping to think helps you decide the best why to act. For example: Letting go of your anger with nasty words is not the same as beating some one up, but still hurtful. Better and more emotionally fit to learn to say what you mean, but not say it mean.

Tip two: Once a day, make a conscious effort to forgive those who have hurt you and then to forgive yourself. Here is a post about forgiveness and letting go. 

Tip three: Strengthen your self-soothing skills. My easy Emotional Fitness Exercises will help you do that. For a quick introduction go here Emotional Fitness Exercises. 

Tip four: Set both a mission for your life, and SMART Goals for living the best everyday life possible.  Practicing Kindness is the healthiest mission. Get my e-Book Know Your Mission So You Can Reach Your Goals . It costs less than a movie and lasts a lifetime.

Tip five: As always Be Grateful, Practice Kindness, and Remember What Matters.

Thank you

Share all you find of value on the internet.  All who post crave recognition. A like says “Thank You.” Comments say you have read and thought about the post. Sharing is a gift to three people: the writer, the people you share with, and you as being kind blesses you.

Katherine

Post Inspiration: This post can be made to relate to this  WordPress Daily Prompt: Taper. How? Taper the impact of negative emotions by strengthening your self-soothing skills.

Go here to learn more about the Daily Prompts.

Links of Interest

These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.

Even the most learned researchers and therapists quarrel about much.  Take their advice and mine carefully.  Don’t just listen to your heart, but also think; don’t just think, listen to your heart.  Heart and head working together increase the odds you will find useful advice amid all the promises and hopes pushed at you be others.  As others have noted, take what seems useful, leave the rest.

Disclaimer two: Forgive my grammatical errors

If  you need perfect posts, you will not find them  here;  I will understand if you don’t follow, like or share what  like me.  Not only am I dealing with an aging brain, but all of my life I have been plagued by dysgraphia–a learning disability,  Some of my posts might be peppered with bad spelling, poor punctuation, and worse words that make no sense.  If  you want to hang in with me, thank you; you are kind. If a post doesn’t make sense or bugs you too much, stop reading, I will understand.

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