Personally, what I find irksome about all the political talk is the tendency to name call or character assassinate which only adds to the divisiveness. Why I used the Kindness Poster Coach as a lead in. However, to get to that point, I have to do a bit of mind work.
First I have to rant back in my head. That is where I name call and at times conjure up revenge. Then I have to use a self-soothing skill or two so I get calm enough to respond with a measure of kindness, when I decide to respond at all. Lots of time, it is best to ignore. Which is one of my tips: Know What Matters and by-pass the small stuff. Here are some other tips:
Emotional Fitness Tips
Tip one: Chose to respond or not. Often the OCD – Obsessive Compulsive Disordered part of our brains often insists we must respond. Not really necessary when it comes to arguing politics or religion.
Tip two: Know that the more emotion attached to an issue, the less reason is at play. So when you want to scream and shout, you aren’t thinking with your brain, just your heart. Emotional fitness involves partnering with both.
Tip three: Understand what is making you or others scream and shout. Usually, emotions grow from the major survival needs known by some as the four f’s – fighting, fleeing, feeding, or f——. The first three are related to individual survival and the fourth to species survival. Fighting about beliefs seems less related to survival, but is a strong need when it comes to emotional survival.
Why is that? To survive emotionally we need a stable world. Imagine for a moment if every time we took a step the floor or ground beneath our feel shifted or changed. We’d quickly become immobilized. Shifts or threatened shifts in our comforting beliefs create great anxiety and so we fight or flee.
Tip four: When threatened rate the threat of contrary opinions. Doing so gets you thinking and thinking reduces emotionally based reactions. Here’s a quick rating scale. 1 = the opinions of people you do not know. 2= the opinions on Facebook. 3 = the opinions of pundits posting as experts. 4. the opinions of experts. 5 = The opinions of those you know and care about.
Tip five: In all heated situations, use your self-soothing skills to stay calm, thoughtful and kind.
Consider buying my eBook Self-soothing To Create Calm in Your Life. It still costs less than a milkshake and is healthier.
Thank you for all you do
Remember to share all you find of value on the internet. All who post crave recognition. A like says “Thank You.” Comments say you have read and thought about the post. Sharing is a gift to three people: the blogger, the people you share with, and you for your kindness blesses you.
Stay strong, it takes some effort for life can be a painful struggle.
Post Inspiration: This post was inspired by the WordPress Daily Prompt: Irksome.
Links of Interest
These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.
- Emotional Intelligence (en.wikipedia.org)
- The five components of emotional Intelligence (www.sonoma.edu)
- About Emotional Fitness Training (emotionalfitnesstraining.com)
- An Emotional Fitness Program for Parents (amazon.com)
Disclaimer two: . Take all advice even mine, carefully. Don’t just listen to your heart, but also think; don’t just think, listen to your heart. Heart and head working together increase the odds you will find useful advice amid all the promises and hopes pushed at you be others. As others have noted, take what seems useful, leave the rest.
Disclaimer two: Forgive my grammatical errors
If you need perfect posts, you will not find them here; I will understand if you don’t follow, like or share what like me. Not only am I dealing with an aging brain, but all of my life I have been plagued by dysgraphia–a learning disability, Some of my posts might be peppered with bad spelling, poor punctuation, and worse words that make no sense. If you want to hang in with me, thank you; you are kind. If a post doesn’t make sense or bugs you too much, stop reading, I will understand.