Face it, criticism hurts. Hurt tells you to run away or stay and fight. Best way? Be grateful and decide for yourself to laugh it off or use it wisely.
The Happiness Gurus tell you “You are perfect just the way you are.”
The makers of the classic movie Love Story believed Love meant “never having to say you’re sorry.”
Remember, all the sages across all the ages have bemoaned the fact that “Love is blind.”
Love may mean you never have to say you are sorry, but it also means you see the other person’s flaws as well as the good stuff.Virginia Satir, family therapist, believed healthy relationships mean being able to tell each other who needed a deodorant. Good to say the critical stuff kindly, but better to have it said; you can always make an amends if you say it mean.
EMOTIONAL FITNESS TiPS
Emotional Fitness tip one: Think about what matters. Criticism only matters if fits you. That means you have to put aside emotions and think about yourself as if you were another person. Hard to do. The Rule of Three helps. Than means wait until you have heard the same criticism at least three times and preferably from three different sources.
Parenting tip one; Teach you child the rule of three. That can start once your child starts walking by using Thomas Phelon’s One, Two, Three Magic. It really is magic in terms of disciplining. In a nut shell, you give your child three chances to obey a rule, and then it is time out.
Parenting tip two: When the child is in third or fourth grade, talk directly about how to handle criticism. At that point teach your child to respond in one of the following ways.
- “Thank you.”
- “I need to work on that.”
- “I am trying my hardest.”
- “I need time to think about what you are saying.”
Role play criticizing. You be the critic and have your child practice saying the above you and s/he can figure out what to say when.
DAILY PROMPT It’s a Text, Text, Text, Text World by Michelle W. How do you communicate differently online than in person, if at all? How do you communicate emotion and intent in a purely written medium?
Writing forces you to think a bit and that is practicing emotional fitness. Of course, some think little as they write so when angry don’t push send. Or do you disagree and think “letting it all hang out” is more honest and best?
THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO
Keep working to stay strong, I work hard to do the same . As noted above, I am not perfect, no one is and this week;s post will be all about praising imperfection.
Remember’s sharing is caring and the easiest way to practice kindness is to share this post if you found it helpful. Thank you.
LINKS OF INTEREST
- When Intuition Fails (apa.org)
- Logical Reasoning (en.wikipedia.org)
- Twisted Thinking (psychologycentral.com))
- Emotional Intelligence (en.wikipedia.org)
- The EFTI Store (eftistore.com)
- Word Press Daily Prompt (wordpress.com)
Don’t think you can afford a life coach? Like a life coach, EFTI’s poster coaches inspire, teach, motivate, and reinforce thinking about what matters. To use, print up in color and post there it will be seen often. Poster Coaches can also be used at Family Meetings to start a discussion about what matters or in a class room to encourage critical thinking.