Thanksgiving Day, the day we are commanded to be thankful. The command alone is enough to darken the day for some. Is that you? Well, cheer up. Gratitude is a skill and skills can be learned and strengthened.
Why bother? Because research shows practicing gratitude improves the moment and adds to longevity. Here is a link to a scientific article about The Nun Study . This study showed that those who practiced gratitude across the course of their life, lived longer and happier than those who stayed focused on the bad that came their way.
If gratitude feels alien to you, try the following:
Emotional Training Tips
Tip one: Learn to rate pain. A broken finger nail is not as bad as a broken arm, which is not as bad as a debilitating chronic illness, which is not as bad as being paralyzed. A stranger’s rudeness is not as bad as a friend’s slight which is not as bad as a loved one’s betrayal. Words that hurt are not as bad as physical attacks.
Tip two: Practice Marsha Linehan’s Radical Acceptance. Radical Acceptance means completely and totally accepting something from the depths of your soul, with your heart and your mind. You stop fighting reality. When you stop fighting you suffer less.
Tip three:When things are difficult, find a slogan that deadens negative self talk and builds hope. Here are some: Now is not forever. Things change, This too will pass. Learning lessons. Staying Strong.
Tip four: Every day practice one or more of the Easy Emotional Fitness Training Exercises.
Tip five: Indulge in healthy pleasures as often as you can. Feed your soul, but also your body. Savor one piece of chocolate; enjoy a cup of tea, massage your feet, dance a jig.
Tip six: Thank the people who serve and help you. Bake cookies for the firemen, the police, the garbage men. Tip well. Complement the cashiers who stand long hours and are required to smile. Being pleasant back always gets me a grateful smile and that lightens up my day.
My eBook, Self-soothing To Create Calm In Your Life remains on sale and is a perfect gift for anyone needed to strengthen their ability to self soothe. Buy one for you and one as a gift and you are spending less than most movie tickets.
As always thank you for all you do. You keep me strong.
Thank you for all you do
Remember to share all you find of value on the internet. All who post crave recognition. A like says “Thank You.” Comments say you have read and thought about the post. Sharing is a gift to three people: the blogger, the people you share with, and you for your kindness blesses you.
Post Inspiration: This post was not inspired by the WordPress Daily Prompt: Chaotic. However, practicing gratitude builds hope and strengthens your emotional intelligence and doing so reduces the stress of chaos.
Links of Interest
These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.
- Emotional Intelligence (en.wikipedia.org)
- The five components of emotional Intelligence (www.sonoma.edu)
- About Emotional Fitness Training (emotionalfitnesstraining.com)
- An Emotional Fitness Program for Parents (amazon.com)
Disclaimer two: Take all advice even mine, carefully. Don’t just listen to your heart, but also think; don’t just think, listen to your heart. Heart and head working together increase the odds you will find useful advice amid all the promises and hopes pushed at you be others. As others have noted, take what seems useful, leave the rest.
Disclaimer three: Forgive my grammatical errors
If you need perfect posts, you will not find them here; I will understand if you don’t follow, like or share what like me. Not only am I dealing with an aging brain, but all of my life I have been plagued by dysgraphia–a learning disability, Some of my posts might be peppered with bad spelling, poor punctuation, and worse words that make no sense. If you want to hang in with me, thank you; you are kind. If a post doesn’t make sense or bugs you too much, stop reading, I will understand.