Emotional Fitness Tips
Tip One: Criticism always hurts. Some deal with the hurt better than others, but we all want to be above criticism. At the same time, real friends do not let friends walk around with broccoli between their teeth. Moreover, good friends must always speak up when safety of anyone is a problem.
Tip Two: When criticism is met with anger, the anger is a defensive response. It helps to think of all feelings as beginning in hurt or fear of hurt. That helps you understand you and others better.
Tip Three: Body language often speaks louder than words. Why I suggest learning to keep soft face and strong body when dishing out some criticism.
Tip four: When you have been critical, make your next interaction a positive one. This is best done totally unrelated to the criticism. With a child, find give a “Just because I love you treat, later in the day.” With a husband or life partner, cook a favorite meal. With all other people just greet them the next time you see with a smile and a compliment.
Here are some other easy positives. Agree when you can, be silent when you do not agree. Only disagree when not expressing your opinion eats at your heart or safety is an issue. Using moderating words and phases. “Maybe,” “Here’s my opinion,” “My thoughts,” “Just my idea,” “I see your point.”
Tip five: Beef up your self-soothing skills. The more you build calmness into your life, the less criticism hurts you and the less you lash out at others. For more help strengthening these skills by Self-Soothing, How to Create Calmness in Your Life. It costs less than a latte and does more good.
Tip six: Always remember what matters. Do not sweat the small stuff and it is almost always small stuff.
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Post Inspiration: This post was inspired by inspired by WordPress Daily One Word Prompt: Sandwich.
Links of Interest
These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.
- Emotional Intelligence (en.wikipedia.org)
- The five components of emotional Intelligence (www.sonoma.edu)
- About Emotional Fitness Training (emotionalfitnesstraining.com)
- An Emotional Fitness Program for Parents (amazon.com)