Posting again on “Tis the season to be jolly?” Bah Humbug Post II
Emotional fitness tip
Great expectations are often a set up for great disappointment. I am fond of a saying found in the Microbe Hunters byPaul de Kruif: “Blessed are they who expect nothing for they shall not be disappointed.”
Of course, it was a message to scientists that their expectations biased their research; it spoke to my heart for I read it the shortly after my heart was broken for the first time. I didn’t expect to love again, but I did, and yes my heart got broken several times, but the desire to love was not quenched by realistic expectations.
Then somewhere in the hard years of parenthood and marriage, I read this by Alice Walker:
Today is full ranting that you can have it all, you need to hold fast to your dreams and all will come true. Delusional, but complicated, because as is said in a song “You gotta have a dream, for a dream to come true.”
Part of staying emotionally fit is holding on to the good and that includes hoping your dreams come true. But it is equally true that you need to face reality. So work toward your dream, but for the pleasure of the journey, knowing you might not reach the desired for destination. Make the journey about what matters for it is all many of us have.
Life is full of good and hurtful feelings. Sometimes hurt is the surprise; sometimes the good is the surprise. Learn from the one and savor the other.
Thinking about what matters is one of my Daily Twelve Emotional Fitness Exercises; the journey toward creating peace in your world and the broader world matters most and not how many gifts you buy or are bought for you.
Practicing kindness is another emotional fitness exercise; being grateful, a third. These three lead to pleasant surprises, but also help when pain is the surprise. Click here to go to the webpage that describes all twelve.
You might enjoy my Emotional Fitness Pinterest Boards. They are designed to keep you strong. Some are laughs, lots are posts of other people’s advice I find useful, both my blogs posts can be found there.
Meanwhile thank you for your support and as I tell myself over and over – share, care, stay strong and suck it up.
DISCLAIMER: FORGIVE MY GRAMMATICAL ERRORS FOR I HAVE DYSGRAPHIA. If you need perfect posts, you will not find them here. Dysgraphia is a not well-known learning disability and means that sometimes my sentence structure is not that easy to follow or I make other errors. Still, most people understand me. All of my books are professionally edited, but not all of my blog posts are. If this troubles you, feel free to read elsewhere. If you persevere, you are practicing kindness by lifting my spirits for that means you find what I say helpful and that is one of my missions. Kindness always repays those who spread it.
All my books can be found on the my Amazon’s Author page For now they are for parents, but come the new year and I will jump into the adult fitness market.