Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

Suffering is a matter of perspective. Snow is loved by skiers and hated by the homeless. Some pray for rain, others curse it. Some moan and groan over a scratch, others endure getting a wound stitched up with a shrug and some laughs. Some starve themselves to get thinner, others die in the streets from hunger and poverty.

As the Irish noted, possibly during the famine, “Enough is a feast.” 

Suffering has some little talked about pleasures.  Sick or wounded enough and you can stay home avoiding work or school. Others seem to care more. You feel justified in doing less. These are called secondary gains by the mental health experts. 


Ten: writhing in pain unable to walk or talk while waiting for the ambulance to come and take you to the hospital.

Nine: waiting to be taken to the hospital by ambulance, but able to talk or sit up or even pace a bit 

Eight: need to see your doctor or a therapist because cannot do what needs doing

Seven: self-care needed, but nothing more

Six: Normal aches and pains accepted and endured while doing what you need to do. Okay to indulge in taking very good care of yourself. 

Five: No physical pain

Four: No emotional pain

Three: Okay all around

Two: Very good

One: You’ve won life’s lottery and more.

Strengthening your self-soothing skills strengthens your ability to stay strong when pain visits. My ebook Self-soothing To Create Calm In Your Life costs less than a latte is more soothing and lasts longer. 


Practice kindness by reading, liking, commenting or sharing this post.  


These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.



Agree or disagree, comments are always welcomed.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.