UNUSUAL SELF-SOOTHING SKILLS – SESSION THIRTEEN

Meditation and calming self talk work and are commonly suggested. This session looks at  less well-known but equally effective ways to self-sooth.  Here’s the first.

LAUGHing

Did the video make you smile a bit.  It works that way for most. Laughter lifts your spirits whether it is hearing another laugh, just practicing laughter as The Laughing Yoga’s do, or using your own wit as a comedian to make others laugh. The best laughter does not poke needles or knives or axes at other people, make Martian jokes about the foibles of humans.

Warning: When you cannot laugh at what amuses others, you are in some sort of trouble. When deep pain, trauma, or self-hatred visit, laughter flees.  That is when professional help is needed.

WALKING MEDITATIONS

These are a less well-known  form of meditating, but very useful, particularly when anger visits.

101 Walking Meditations

Of course, there are times you cannot walk particularly if you need to stomp and chant. Then, what might help is imaging a walk. That is best done in you brain’s sanctuary.  Here’s how to create such a sanctuary.

To use a sanctuary for visualization, pick something for a screen. Some use a cloud, others an actual t.v. screen they have put in their imaginary sanctuary.

To use a sanctuary for visualization, pick something for a screen. Some use a cloud, others an actual t.v. screen they have put in their imaginary sanctuary.

If you have trouble visualizing, you are far from alone.  You might be among those who have to use words and not pictures to “visualize.” Here’s a tip, even if you visualize with ease, adding the words strengthens that skill.  Some of you have trouble with both seeing pictures or using words, body movements might help you. Again adding words will strengthen all these type of skills.

CREATing Something – Peaceful hands

I founded Emotional Fitness Training, Inc. and as teen found calm in a number of creative skills. Crocheting was an early on  favorite, but you cannot do that in a class room. Taking notes combined with doodling got me through many a lecture.  As I moved to helping others I discovered Mind Mapping.  What’s that?  A advanced form of note taking that forces you to think about what you are mapping, but lets you doodle.  You can learn about mind mapping here.

In time I added origami, particularly making peace cranes for a peace project I started when directing a mental health program for families and children.  That project gave me an excuse to fold cranes at those long and often boring meetings on has to attend at the managerial level of any business and mental health is a business.  I also fold peace cranes at restaurants and leave them as part of the tip.

PARENTING TIP

Finally, I read that Bruce Perry, the psychiatrist who debriefed the children traumatized by cult leader David Koresh, never sat down to talk with a child about something that mattered without having crayons and coloring books and coloring with the child.

That made me bring crayons and adult coloring material to my master level classes and my workshops for the less educated. My only rule, was you had to keep half and ear on what I was saying and put down your crayons if I said to, which I did when I thought a point was important for all to hear.

WHAT’S NEXT

On to the next skill – Thinking about whether to act. Self-soothing is the most popular of my workshops and course, but Thinking About Whether to Act is the most important, so I hope you will keep taking the course.

POST INSPIRATION: DAILY PROMPT

I often use these prompts to spark my posts.  They can also be used to improve your critical thinking is the heart of emotional intelligence.

You can think about them as they are stated or use them to spark other thoughts which is what I usually do. Most can be related to Emotional Fitness. How? Well here is the prompt that connects to this post. I’ll answer it and tell you how I relate it to Emotional Fitness.

Trick or Trick  It’s Halloween, and you just ran out of candy. If the neighborhood kids (or anyone else, really) were to truly scare you, what trick would they have to subject you to?

My answer:  One creepy crawly thing would get me squirming. What’s that, Finding a worm of some sort in my food. Most particularly, the little green worms found in ears of corn and tent caterpillars.    Think I might have eaten one of the green ones as a child, and I know my brothers loved to put ten caterpillars down my back. Yuck.

How this related to the Emotional Fitness Training blog post above? Most fears have a root in early man’s survival needs. Many creepy crawling things are poisonous.  So fears that remain from childhood are very strong and require much self-soothing so they can be thought about carefully.

How this relates to emotional fitness and today’s post. Self-soothing skills keep your from getting so out of breathe you run hither and dither.

MORE FREE  STUFF FROM EFTI

All the handouts and poster coaches for this course are being posted at the store so you can download them for free  (Handouts are in Black and White while Foster Coaches are in color.)

Some might not be up yet.  I am a Jill of all in this business, so some things take longer than others.  If a handout isn’t posted yet, you will find lots of other offerings including inspirational quotes or more EFTI exercises.

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LINKS OF INTEREST

PRACTICE KINDNESS

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Thank you and work at staying strong until next time. I am.

Katherine

4 Comments

  1. Pingback: FEELING EXCHANGE STRATEGY – SESSION TWENTY | Emotional Fitness

  2. I have found walking meditations extremely helpful in dealing with anger. When my children were young and I had difficulty finding time to plan, my anger would frequently get the best of me. If my husband came home and found I needed a break, he would take over, and I would walk out my anger. By the time I made it around a few blocks, I would be refreshed and have a plan ready that would enable me to proceed calmly.

  3. Pingback: Daily Prompt - Halloween 2014 | RobertMcQ

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