“Flattery will get you everywhere.”

Or so my father said. This #Emotional_Fitness Training blog post examines why so many of us reject sincere praise as unacceptable flattery. 

"No way you look fifty."

I hate hearing “You look great for your age.” Thank you Mark Stevens for this one.

I hate it worse when my doctor says “My brain is fine.”  She doesn’t add “For your age” but the thought is there. And yes, I do look pretty good for my age and my brain works better than many. Still, aging is difficult and I don’t know any one on what I call the downhill slope of life who would  not prefer the looks and brain they had at a younger age.

However, those who say or think “Good for your age” are offering up a sincere compliment and you should not discount the compliment. Too often we do.

Emotional fitness thoughts and tip

Why do we reject so many sincere and well intention-ed compliments as flattery which means not sincere?  It all goes back to the Curse of Personal Knowledge. Because we know our flaws, our struggles as no other person can, so we are quick to discount another’s praise as flattery. 

Today’s emotional fitness training tips

Tip one: Accept all compliments that come your way, a few maybe false:  reject ing all is twisted thinking – generalizing, mind reading, filtering what is said through your window of Personal Knowledge.

No matter what you feel about someone praising you, accept and say “Thank You.”

Tip two: Compliments are a way to Practice Kindness, an Emotional Fitness exercise.  When accepted  two people’s #Emotional_Intelligence is strengthened; the person complimented and the compliment giver.

If you want your compliments  accepted, two strategies help: One is to complement strangers. You will always get a big smile and a “Thank you.” Well, almost always.

Then always pass along the nice things you hear others saying about someone you both know. I call these “Secondhand”Compliments.”

Stay strong

Remember happiness is more about how you feel about yourself, what you have, how you look, or what others say about you.  Remember what matters and strive to live by Practicing Kindness, caring and sharing. These  matter most.

Here is today’s EFT’s Free Poster Coach, 

Flattery #quotes

Finally, this post was inspired by both a  Word Press  Daily Prompt: The Sincerest Form of Flattery Publish a post in the style of a favorite author/blogger or photographer. As usual I did my own thing about the topic.

Thank you for all you do. I am particularly grateful to those who practice internet kindness by liking, rating, commenting, or sharing my posts.




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