SUFFERING? MAYBE, MAYBE NOT

 Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

Suffering is a matter of perspective. Snow is loved by skiers and hated by the homeless. Some pray for rain, others curse it. Some moan and groan over a scratch, others endure getting a wound stitched up with a shrug and some laughs. Some starve themselves to get thinner, others die in the streets from hunger and poverty.

As the Irish noted, possibly during the famine, “Enough is a feast.” 

Suffering has some little talked about pleasures.  Sick or wounded enough and you can stay home avoiding work or school. Others seem to care more. You feel justified in doing less. These are called secondary gains by the mental health experts. 

RATING SCALES TAKE THE MAYBE OUT OF SUFFERING

Ten: writhing in pain unable to walk or talk while waiting for the ambulance to come and take you to the hospital.

Nine: waiting to be taken to the hospital by ambulance, but able to talk or sit up or even pace a bit 

Eight: need to see your doctor or a therapist because cannot do what needs doing

Seven: self-care needed, but nothing more

Six: Normal aches and pains accepted and endured while doing what you need to do. Okay to indulge in taking very good care of yourself. 

Five: No physical pain

Four: No emotional pain

Three: Okay all around

Two: Very good

One: You’ve won life’s lottery and more.

Strengthening your self-soothing skills strengthens your ability to stay strong when pain visits. My ebook Self-soothing To Create Calm In Your Life costs less than a latte is more soothing and lasts longer. 

SOME FINAL WORDS

Practice kindness by reading, liking, commenting or sharing this post.  

Katherine

These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.

 

 

Don’t Think You Pray? Think Again

 Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

 

How we all pray.

Prayers of gratitude, meaning a heart-felt thank you, are always answered, for they strengthen you.

SOME FINAL WORDS

Practice kindness by reading, liking, commenting or sharing this post.  

Katherine

P.S. Think about buying one of my eBooks. They cost less than a latte, last longer, and are healthier.  Create Calm In Your Life is the newest. 

These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.

 

 

HOW TO BE ALONE BUT NOT LONELY

 Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

Quote; Hunter Thompson,

Becoming deaf forced me to stop relying on others. Perhaps if I had been born deaf, I would have become part of a deaf community. But my deafness is inherited and came on slowly, but eventually became so bad I was cut off from most other people. Hearing aids helped but even my recent Cochlear Implant leaves me out of any conversation that is not one-on-one and mostly minus background noise. 

Not hearing accurately erodes your self-esteem. The same applies to many things, but mainly to any condition that makes you different than the others around you. Think other handicaps, chronic illnesses, aging, but also depending on those around you, think: skin color, appearance, religion, apparent wealth or lack of wealth.   

Even sadder, disagreeing or questioning another’s point of view also puts and keeps you outside of the Circle of Caring. Once upon a time, I joined the politically correct movement. However, I resigned a number of years ago. Why? Words that could and should have been ignored were embraced and “awfulized” and viewed as a public attack. Victimhood grew and continues to grow.  

What to do?

  1. Locate who has the problem. When you let other people’s non-violent opinions hurt you, the problem is yours.
  2. Start using rating scales to measure how seriously you should take someone’s opinion of you. Here’s a five-point rating  scale: 5 = threatening violence; 4 = something to think more about; 3 = hurting because I let it hurt me;  2=an opinion only; 1 = not my problem. 
  3. Use positive self-talk slogans to offset the negativity.
  4. Call an upbeat friend. 
  5. Learn to be alone without being lonely. Meditate; indulge in a healthy pleasure; laugh, play, create; Remember what matters. 

SOME FINAL WORDS

Practice kindness by reading, liking, commenting or sharing this post.  Watch for the release of my newest eBook. Creating Calm. 

Katherine

These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.

 

 

Embrace Your Flaws

How To Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

How to practice imperfect.

SOME FINAL WORDS

While Perfectism is beyond us, kindness is not. Practice kindness by reading, liking, commenting or sharing this post.  Then Consider buying Defang Fear In All Its Disguises. 

It costs $2.99 which is less than a latte, lasts longer, and does more good. Also, it is free to those with  Kindle Unlimited. 

Katherine

These links are for those not familiar with Emotional Intelligence or the idea of Emotional Fitness.